August 17, 2012 by Erin

An Aside

Growing up is awesome. I love where I am in life, even though my looming 26th birthday puts me closer to 30 than feels possible. I guess I’m a bit of a late bloomer, because I feel like I’m still blooming. I really didn’t start coming into my own until college, and now, in my mid-twenties, I’m starting to feel more settled and relaxed in who I am.

I work with the middle-schoolers at church, and last year I came home after every Wednesday meeting thinking, “oh my goodness, I’m so glad I’m not 12 anymore.” I mean, do you remember junior high? Everyone frantically scurrying around, begging for validation, wondering how they should act. Aren’t you glad that’s over? I’m so relieved I don’t live like that anymore.

I guess I’ve always had a pretty strong personality, but I’m feeling like now, more than ever, I just know who I am. I know what I think, what I like, what I’m about. I’m so much more confident and comfortable in my own skin. Thankfully, I’ve never had huge self-esteem issues, despite the fact that I have always been a nerd. But I did used to spend quite a bit of time trying to read social situations, wondering if I fit in, second guessing myself. I don’t do that so much anymore. Not only that, but parts of me that I’d sort of been downplaying or hiding have had a chance to come out — especially over the last two years.

I’m pretty thrilled with where my life is, too. I’m not exactly where I thought I’d be at 25, but I can honestly say it’s better than whatever I had planned. Sometimes I get a little antsy and think by now I should be more established or making more money or married or whatever, but then I remember I have an incredible life. I’ve, like, done stuff, you know? I’ve seen lions in South Africa and interviewed Palestinian refugees in Jordan. I’ve lived on my own and figured out how to mow the lawn and pay bills. I have a great degree, and, even though it’s not big time, I get paid to do what I love. I have incredible, life-giving friendships with stellar people. And I’m part of the world’s best family. Jesus has been impossibly faithful. What more could I ask for?

The older I get, the better it gets. So I’m embracing this whole adult thing. I did have a little freak out moment yesterday when I realized I was in the middle of a conversation about dry chicken with my friend Elisabeth, but, hey, bring on the recipe-swapping. I know who I am and I love my life. As far as I’m concerned, 26 is looking pretty good

#Blog Wars 2012